Are You My Brother?

No one knows until they have been there how hurtful it can be when someone you grew up with all your life shuts you out of theirs. And now? Am I suppose to walk away and pretend nothing is wrong? Shouldn't I deserve a reason as to why they are acting this way? I feel I do - you see they went three years and didn't speak until our mom passed away and they apologized and all was well or so I thought! And now here we go again... Silence, pass right by you as if you were not there! Well I am human, I have feelings and if I am responsible for your feelings toward me - give me a reason why!!! I do deserve that much. Life is too short to worry about petty mess as this yet I don't understand! We had been fine and all of a sudden bam...

We have lost loved ones time and time again since our mom left us in 2000 and it hurts to know we are in the same room and never speak, I have tried to talk to him and he acts as if I am not there - everybody sees this, they are not blind or are they? We are brother and sisters, what is the meaning of this? Why is he like this?

January 15th, a few days ago, we lost yet another loved one and of course there he came in to pay his respects. As he greeted our older sister and her brother-in-law, he turned his head away from me as I spoke and I am standing right there just as if he didn't see me. Oh how bad it hurts and I don't know exactly how to deal with this... It is so easy for people to tell me not to worry about it, especially when it is my sister and she is not going through this stupid mess!!!****************************

Okay, so I have made my mind up - if he feels this way and wants to shut me out of his life - so be it, I can't make him care about me. There are a lot of things I would love to say to him but I won't - I give up! Right now this is the way I feel and hope he will see this one day - because right now if something happens to me I don't want him come around - if he can't talk to me or come around me now while I am breathing, I don't need him there after I am gone! So there!!!

Before I Go…

I’d love to know how you felt
As you paid your last respects
To someone we knew all our lives
Do you really feel the effects?
Death will come to us all
Would you be there for me?
After all, you’re my brother
Everyone will see…
They don’t know how you’ve shunned me
You’ve shut me out of your life
I’m not sure I even know why
Will I know in the afterlife?
It really hurts as you walk by
Hugging your two sisters as you meet
Why you even turn your head
When I pass you on the street –
Why can’t you be a man?
Talk to me in an honest way
You know so many watches you
As you put me on display!
So many have asked me why
You walk past me like you do
I’ve always shrugged my shoulders
‘Cause I don’t know what I did to you…
Before I go just one more thing
I’m sorry how you feel
When I close my eyes in death
Just keep your feelings real…

Your Sister, Tip
1/18/10

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"The Scare of My Life"

The day began as always, Daddy says his "goodbyes" and it is time to feed the kids. Kodie, 7 mos. today to be exact, had finished her breakfast and was a little fussy. After rocking her a little she started getting sleepy so I laid her down in the little crib for her to nap while I retrieved her pillow for her little head. One second and Kiara who is 6 years old and staying with me while school is out started screaming "Mawmaw, Kodie isn't breathing!" How I got turned around and picked her up I don't know, she had turned purple and would not respond to me whatsoever... tears flowing, my heart pounding as I tried to get her to move something - oh my God she was limp as a dishcloth. Grabbing the phone I called her Daddy and told him what was going on - he never hesitated to ask questions as he broke down in tears. All he could say was "oh Mama, what's wrong? I'll be there in a few minutes." Running through the house to go out back where Pawpaw was working, she looked up at me. Gosh it felt like all this happened in hours and in reality it was just a few seconds, "Kodie", I cried as she finally came back to me, she looked like a ghost, white and still. Calling her Daddy I assured him she was okay and looking around some. I felt as if I were running in quicksand and my feet wouldn't move - how in the world is this happening, how am I going to face my son and his wife if something worse happened? So many things went through my mind as I paniced and worried so. Sitting on the couch with Kodie and Kiara she smiled and smacked my hand playing with my rings, "oh Kodie you are ok!" as I hugged held to my chest.

My son arrived and after a few minutes of hugs, reliefs and assuring all is well, his wife calls and says to meet her at the doctor to have him check Kodie out. He finally sends her to the local hospital and has an EKG ran on her. Finding out later her Mom did this a lot as a child. Those little crying spells and I mean they are something and pitiful! She is fine, my son called a while ago checking on me - this is my lesson, this added ten years to my life today and I will hold her more and never leave her side!

(The dates on pictures are wrong - of course I'm a day late!)

Kodie playing with her ducky!

Kiara


Silly Kodie



My Little Kodie

What to do when your child holds its breath:

Breath-holding usually happens when babies or children:
• are crying
• are frightened or upset
• have had a minor accident and have gone into shock.
These children will cry, then catch their breath and ‘hold’ it without breathing. This is not done on purpose – even if it seems that children are holding their breath as part of an extreme tantrum.
Scary as they are, breath-holding spells usually end within 30-60 seconds, when children catch their breath and start to cry or scream. In some cases, children will hold their breath until they lose conciousness. When this happens, the body automatically kick-starts breathing again.
Some cases of breath-holding are associated with iron deficiency anaemia. Your GP can do a simple blood test to determine whether this is a likely cause.
Children as young as six months can have breath-holding spells. Around 90% of children stop doing it by the time they’re six. The spells can happen as often as several times a day, or as rarely as once a year.
Breath-holding does not cause long-term damage. There’s no evidence that it has any harmful effects on the brain.
What to do when children hold their breath
Follow these tips to help children through breath-holding spells.
• Stay calm. The spell is likely to pass within a minute.
• Lay child on the side and watch over until the spell ends.
• Do not put anything in the child’s mouth, not even your fingers to clear the airway. If the child starts having jerky movements, you can hold the child’s head, arms or legs to prevent injury.
• Don’t shake the baby or child. This won’t stop the breath-holding and can cause injuries.
• Reassure other children or adults present that it is a harmless spell and will pass soon.
• Sometimes children might fall and hurt themselves during the spell. If you think this has happened, it’s best to check with a doctor.
When to see a doctor
Most parents want to have their child checked when breath-holding occurs the first time. In particular, consult a doctor if your child:
• is younger than six months
• has frequent attacks (more than once a week). Ask whether anaemia might be a cause. If it is, ask about the possibility of using iron supplements
• looks confused or drowsy after the breath-holding
• has shaking and stiffness lasting for much longer than a minute, and takes a while to recover. This might not be simple breath-holding.
Preventing breath-holding
You can’t prevent breath-holding, but you might be able to prevent the events leading up to it.
• When children start to get upset, try to distract them.
• Reassure children after they’ve had a fright or a shock.
• Give children plenty of warning if you need to make a change to a different or new activity or situation. This means they won’t get too much of a fright when things change.
• Learn more about managing tantrums. You might be tempted to give in to your child during a tantrum, because you are worried the tantrum will cause breath-holding. But giving in to tantrums often causes more tantrums.
The two types of breath-holding
Cyanotic breath-holding (or ‘blue spells’) is the most common type of breath-holding. Children who are affected:
• are crying or upset
• catch and hold their breath and then turn a bluey-purple colour, particularly around the mouth.
Pallid or pale breath-holding (or ‘pale spells’) is less common than cyanotic. Children:
• might not be crying
• catch and hold their breath – their heart rate slows down and their skin can look pale
• sweat and are tired when the spell is over
• who have these spells might also faint as adolescents or adults.
During both types of breath-holding, some children pass out and once they do their breathing kick-starts again. Some children have jerky movements or a seizure, but this is very rare.

Surrounded By Females;

No other person in this world could be as blessed to have such a wonderful brother-in-law as I am. James has been like a brother to me for the many years he was with us. Always there to lend a hand if you needed anything - always there to lend an ear if you needed to talk about anything... Loved my sister, his daughters, granddaughters and great-granddaughters so much and his family - this man will surely be missed by us all. There are so many memories we have of James and believe me we can share them with a lot of tears and smiles. His memory will be with us for always...

In Memory of James Carroll McBride

1/7/40 - 3/21/09

Those we love don't go away,

They walk beside us every day,

Unseen, unheard, but always near,

Still loved, still missed and very dear.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Poor James we used to kid him about being surrounded by females all the time;

he didn't stand a chance with us when we all gathered -

luckily our brother would show on some occasions.

This poem speaks for itself -

Surrounded By Females

Young and in love he never had a chance
As partnering in life he did the dance
All grown up with very few misters
This man was blessed with so many sisters
Quite a sense of humor, kept us laughing a lot
Surrounded by females he found his spot
One was his wife through vows they made
Two were his daughters as through life they played
Even two female dogs for their family pets
Surrounded by females he had no regrets
Two daughters grown up and on their way
With lives of their own there on display
Three little granddaughters come along
Surrounded by females he sang the cradlesong
One granddaughter grew up and she married
Now two great-granddaughters he loved and babied
Surrounded by females who loved him so
God took his hand saying “it’s time to go”
In poor health for so many years
We all said ‘goodbye’ through prayers and tears
Later that evening standing by his grave
He was surrounded by females getting ribbons to save.

We miss you James
3/25/09

Brit holding Riley - Teresa - Alison - Stormy

Jamie - Tammy - Elaine

Tammy - Judy - Elaine

Teresa - Jamie - Alison - Tammy

Judy - Tip (Me)

Riley - Brit
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It will be the little things that you will remember,

the quiet moments, the smiles, the laughter.

And although it may seem hard right now,

it will be the memories of these little things

that help to push away the pain

and bring the smiles back again.

Grieve not, nor speak of me with tears, but laugh

And talk of me as if I were beside you.

I loved you so—‘twas heaven here with you -

James * (Daddy & Papaw)

Our Fun Loving Friend - Dewboy

William Landon Doss aka "Dewboy",

A son, a father indeed a best friend

Faithfully beside you surely till the end

He gave up the fight as two hearts were broken

In silence he left us as soft words were spoken

"I give up, I'm hurting, I love them so much

I need that warmth, that special touch" -

Loving two daughters, his eyes they gleamed

Being a family he longed for, he dreamed.

Surely he will be missed for he is loved so

While all left behind - we'll grieve I know.

God bless his dear loved ones

Peace and comfort be with you

(The picture above was made in 1998 Karoke at Blanche's in Graham, NC)

**********************

This is Dewboy and Jamie, my youngest son aka Thumper on Christmas Day 1992, we lived on Sidney Ave, Burlington, NC. Oh look at the smiles and happiness here and oh so very young. Landon was 28 years old & Jamie was 16 years old.

How do you describe such a friendship as this? Landon and Jarrett, two best friends who were inseperable while living here in Burlington. After Dewboy married and moved to New Jersey they still communicated through phone calls and visits. No better friends than these two. They shared and dreamed the same dreams and yet fate had other plans for the two of them.

Ricky and Dewboy singing (well, if you could have heard Ricky's helper there!) at Blanche's - it was hilarious that night and it was not a dull moment...

My friend Blanche and Dewboy

Dewboy doing "The Jig"

Courtney, Heather and Landon

Christmas at my house 1997.

William Landon Doss

Sending an angel to watch over his girls, Harleigh & Courtney

Saying Goodbye To "Dewboy"

William Landon Doss
WESTMONT, N.J. - On Jan. 26, 2009, William Landon Doss, 44, passed away. He was the loving father of Courtney Doss and Harleigh Doss of Westmont; the dear son of Eula Mae Doss of Burlington, N.C.; brother of Patricia D. Smith (Clifford) of Burlington, N.C. and Crystal J. Webster (Jack) of Stokesdale, N.C. Relatives and friends are invited to attend his visitation Saturday, Jan. 31, from 9 to 10 a.m. at Kingsway Church, 2701 Chapel Ave., Cherry Hill, N.J. 08002, followed by his funeral service at 10 a.m. In lieu of flowers, contributions in Landon's memory may be made to Heather Doss, c/o First Colonial National Bank, 1040 Haddon Ave., Collingswood, N.J. 08108. Interment will be private. For e-condolences, please visit www.jacksonfh.net.

Published in the TheTimesNews.com from 1/29/2009 - 1/31/2009

There are guestbooks you can sign for the girls if you'd like

Heavens Newest Angel…
William Landon Doss

"Dewboy"
September 21, 1964 – January 26, 2009

Celebrating in life of forty-four years
We’ve lost you now while wiping away tears
Angels came down and swept you away
You left here happy going thru `Heavens Gateway~
"To my daughter's, I'm sorry, I meant you no pain

Be good and love life for we will meet again.
I lived life to the fullest, loved you so, it’s true.
There's a smile on my face as I speak to you -
“God gave me two daughters and I cherish you so
I know that you love me and I hated to go
My daughters I leave to you, my memory
Just think of me often, there I will be
My days here on earth were so very sad
Tried loving my family and being your dad
But you see I am happy now, please understand
I’m Heavens Newest Angel, holding God’s hand.”

I Love You,
Daddy
1/30/09

(Written by: Sylvia “Tip” Allison)

"Dewboy" was and always will be my oldest son's bestfriend - he is now going through a rough time after having to say "goodbye" to Landon. They have been friends for years - I have pictures of the two of them and will be posting on here for Landon's girls.

If you read this - please leave a comment or Email me - I will see to it Harleigh and Courtney gets a copy of every item sent.

Thank you and Have A Blessed Day!

(Click here to email me)

~My Little Star~ NOAH

January 5, 2009 is my little grandson Noah's 5th birthday. He stayed with me on New Years' Eve day and reminded me at least a hundred times his birthday is on Monday, January 5th and he would be five years old - little did he know he was getting a "Spiderman" birthday party! Spiderman is his favorite character - well hero...

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Rainy and cool - a lot of people didn't get to come to the party because of being sick. This crazy weather has really put a damper on the holidays with colds and such! The weather has had it's ups and downs we never quite knew what to wear going out - one day it is warm and the next it is cold - so we all suffer the consequence's of the weather...

To You & Yours: ~Happy New Year~

From Poetmaw's Desk ...

My wish for you is peace and love with friendship through and through; as I make new friends online I am blessed that they remain faithful and honest. I am wishing you all the best for New Years and always. Hoping 2009 will be a year we all prosper and see changes for the good in the economy and the country. Let's continue to pray for our troops and hope they all will return soon to their loved ones and the country they fight for. Please pray God sends them home safely. See you in 2009!

I am a big fan of Carly Simon - loved her in my younger years and still do! Her songs and words are from her heart and has so very much meaning. Hope you will listen to this song"Anticipation"